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Gary aka The Cabbaginator (He/Him) is a 123 year old (DOB: July 29, 1900) half-blood wizard living in Ministry Of Magic. He wields a 14¼" Elder, Runespoor Fang wand, and a member of Gryffindor. His favorite Harry Potter book is Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and his favorite Harry Potter character is Sybill Trelawney.

About Me
He walked right into two squabbling midgets engaged in a ferocious battle, was Lockhart-ed and wandered into the Forbidden Forest, with no memory of his life before.
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After his Hogwarts graduation, Gary became an Auror at the Ministry of Magic. Sick of his monotonous work-life, he took an extended break. As he wandered across the lands, he befriended all sorts of creatures, from giants to bloodthirsty werewolves.
His fondest memory: sipping tea with a traveling heavy-metal band of ex-Death Eaters, and throwing darts at a mudblood.
Gary returned to civilization feeling refreshed. Many times, he's questioned his line of work as an Auror.

He's a corrupt Auror who will keep Death Eaters out of Azkaban for a price.

He's proud of his big sister WillowStarr, who's the greatest cook in the world. She's also the scariest person when she catches him eating paint chips or exploding their porta potty.

Found the sweetest, most irresistible witch in the world, Xaviera Veridel . (Thank you for accepting me for who I am, even when my mind is too far gone)

2020 Update: Gary returned to his shack at Ottery St Catchpole. He tried to work at the MoM the next day, only to be thrown out because he'd been fired 4 years ago. He thinks the Ministry is mental and sings sorrowful ballads outside the building...and sometimes inside the building when he breaks in. He's discovered that the Ministry Fountain is a perfect potty spot.
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I like hats. Donate to the GMC Hat Fund

Subject: Abigail has delivered a gift to you!
SweetPea Xaviera has delivered a hat as a gift.
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Never ignore a Zombie:

Cabbage Gary has been slain travelling to Number 12 Grimmauld Place by Restless Zombie.
"Watch your back, Restless Zombie I am coming for you!" Cabbage Gary warns.
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List O' Great Folk:
Bats, Chef, Fetus, Green Pepper Lady, Kiddo, Regerus, Sweetpea, Willer